when you don’t get what you’re promised from purity culture…
Today we are excited to have the Sexvangelicals, that is Julia Postema and Jeremiah Gibson, on our podcast! Julia and Jeremiah are licensed and AASECT certified psychotherapists who use their personal and professional lives and experience to work with relationships where at least one partner has been a part of high control religion, fundamentalism or purity culture.
Resources
Developmental Model - Ellen Bater
AASECT.org - finding a sex therapist
Six Steps for a structured question
Decide on specific topic - key word SPECIFIC! (Ex: what are my favorite places to be touched, to be kissed, preferences around initiation)
Agenda - (not rigid) what is the purpose of this conversation? Eg. understanding each other better, resolving conflict
Choose a time and location that will set you up for success (beginning and end) - try to make it outside the house
Set a timer based on the topic, level of vulnerability and your level of experience in these conversations
Stay on topic! Once you’ve decided what the topic is, write it on a sticky note or card what the topic is so you can refer to it later to help you stay on topic!
Aftercare - sometimes these conversations can be going or vulnerable so how can you come back together with your partner *(e.g. a game, going out to eat, cuddling)
This podcast is brought to you by the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery: an online trauma coaching company whose practitioners are trauma informed and trauma trained to work with individuals, couples and families who have experienced high control religion, cults, and religious trauma. For more information on the support that CTRR provides, for resources–including courses, workshops, and more–head to traumaresolutionandrecovery.com or follow us on Instagram: @traumaresolutionandrecovery
The views and opinions expressed by Sunday School Dropouts are those of the hosts and not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the Center for Trauma Resolution and Recovery. Any of the content provided by our guests, sponsors, authors, or bloggers are their own ideas and opinions.
The Sunday School Dropouts podcast is not anti-religion but it is anti -harm, -power and control, -oppression and, -abuse and will speak to the harmful practices and messaging of fundamentalist groups.
Follow Andrew on Instagram and TikTok @deconstruct_everything
Follow Laura on Instagram and TikTok @drlauraeanderson or on her website: www.drlauraeanderson.com
Hosts:
Laura Anderson and Andrew Kerbs
Music by Benjamin Faye Music @heytherebenji
Editing and Production by Kevin Crowe and can be found at www.kevincrowe.co.